AKA ‘CockZilla’ or ‘Cock-a-saurus Rex’
The is the Dildo that comes with a size warning!!
Some dongs may be longer, but none are as thick…weighs over 5 pounds
Caution: Please do not order unless you understand the size. The picture is small but the dong is not!
I never ever thought I could have a single positive thing to say about a toy that was labelled as a ‘novelty’ style sex toy, let alone one so laden with phthalates that it left its somewhat unpleasant aroma throughout my entire house as well as a greasy wet spot on its cardboard packaging… But seriously as a Novelty ONLY the super Duper Dildo is rather fun to own.
So just what is the Super Duper Dildo?
It’s 5 pounds of smelly Rubber Cock, that reeks of phthalates and feels kinda ‘oogie’ & greasy to the touch, but it’s a whopping 14″ high, 3 inches wide across the shaft and boasting a mind boggling and pussy scarring girth of 9″.
So both its size and material stick it in the ‘Novelty Only’ category,but boy do I love owning it. I’m a bit of an odd and Quirky Person, and enjoy the looks of horror or shock on friend’s faces when I introduce them to ‘CockZilla’, as often we end up collapsing in laughter and general hilarity ensues.
I know that X secretly wishes I’d let him use it on me, he’s always loved ‘experimenting’ with what my pussy can & cannot handle – even -B piped up after I showed him, saying I should give it a go and surely I could handle it (not sure whether to take that as a positive or a negative comment??) Seriously though even If I could find Condoms big enough and thick enough to protect me from it’s not so safe materials I honestly don’t think I could take it. I kinda do think I could be a size queen, (as I suspect any woman who’d pushed a 10 & a half pound (Just shy of 5kg) baby out of her Vag would) Yet trust me, there is no way I could accommodate this big boy, at least not without quite a bit of preparation and conditioning, not to mention a big bucket worth of Lube! Even then I don’t think my Cervix would be thanking me for giving it such a pounding… but not everyone thinks or feels the same way I do.
With great thanks to my fellow Aussie sex toy reviewer, The Cherry Scoop – I have found a wonder woman who could take on the Super Duper Dildo… and maybe more, her fantastic skills are shown off in the clip linked to below. She isn’t taking on my version of cockzilla in this clip, but rather the similarly sized ‘Great American Challenge‘ which is also available from Adult Sex Toys .com
you can view the clip at :http://www.yuvutu.com/modules.php?name=Video&op=view&video_id=392388 – just copy & paste the url into your browser ((sorry but this video filed was causing all sorts of issues for my blog ))
If like her you would like to take on the cockzilla, for your own safety I would seriously recommend the use of at least one condom to keep yourself protected from its non body safe materials. And whether you choose to use it as a sex toy or not you will need to wash it and keep it clean, as with all adult products made from these kinds of materials the Super Duper Dildo does tend to pick up every single piece of dust, lint and dog hair that comes into proximity with it. I’ve found that the good old warm soapy water does the trick – just let it air dry though as it will pick up all the fluff off of anything you try to dry it with
I had to turn to Twitter & all my sexy followers to come up with some possible practical & body safe uses for Cockzilla.
Using it as a Door Stop Is what I believe was the most popular choice. I thought I could paint it and coat it in layers of lacquer to
contain its chemical scent, perhaps even have it bronzed like they do to baby’s first pair of shoes! I can already see the look of shock & horror on my mum’s face if she saw it holding the door open!
It could also work well as a book end, perhaps an Incense holder – by poking a hole in the top to put the incense stick…but then
again it could be a fire risk. It could also be a great replacement for your favourite room spray or air freshener if you like the smell of phthalates.
It would most definitely be an appropriate gift for an up an coming bride going out on her hen’s night – carrying it around all night having to get her photo taken with it at every bar you drink at! Something like that gnome that went around the world sending photo postcards back to its original owner.
The most original Use was suggested by @AltGuy on twitter, he suggested you could buy 4 and along with a piece of glass you could create yourself a pretty damn unique coffee table! You could possibly even sell ‘Cockzilla Coffee Tables’ on Etsy, but be sure to share the profits with altguy as it really was his idea first:P
So although this sex toy isn’t one I’d ever consider using as an actual sex toy Cockzilla is still a pretty cool Novelty Adult toy that really is fun to own, It’s great fun to shock people with, even if it’s only by showing them Photos. It would be quite funky & somewhat cool If I had a lovely glass cabinet where I could store it on Display (I figure the glass might trap its toxic scent) Perhaps, one day, when my son has finally left home I’ll be able to put cockzilla proudly on display and let my visitors assume I’m an uber size queen.
If you want your own Cockzilla you can get the Super Duper Dildo from Adult Sex Toys.com, where it is currently on sale for$36.61 ((price correct @ time of original publication))
Or If you wish to take on Something Large, But Body Safe there is Always the Vixskin Outlaw which also has an impressive 6 1/2″ girth, with an insertable shaft length of 9″ with the bonus of being 100% body safe made from super-realistic vixskin textured silicone.
Violet xx
P.S for all the Aussie guys & girls who want to get their hands on a Super Sized Dildo I’ve Found an Aussie Company that Stocks the ‘Great American Challenge Or you could try out the Slightly smaller but 100% body safe Mega Drive Dong from Femplay, but I can’t tell you much about them as I’ve only ever seen them on the internet
Stephen Moore says
It could also work well as a book end, perhaps an Incense holder – by poking a hole in the top to put the incense stick…but then
again it could be a fire risk.
Bookend, yes. But please, not as an incense holder. Great idea, but if you don’t want blokes sitting nearby with strained and painful looks upon their faces, probably best not utilise it as such. Unless they’re into urethral play.
Screaming Violet says
Now that you’ve said that – I may just have to do so…at least when X is home and pissing me off lmao – you got me laughing so hard
Missy says
Yikes! I actually want to get a huge cock some day too…I will probably hold out for a silicone one though in case I do decide to take it on 🙂
Midnight Boudoir says
Ohh it would make a great candle holder if you put a hole in the top, imagine a sparkler lol.
Oh wow thats got to be impossible.